


Love Now

by itxokayish



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abusive Relationship, Bottom Keith (Voltron), Emotinal Abuse, F/M, Gay Keith (Voltron), Human Lotor (Voltron), Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt Lance (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, I don’t know for this fix I really liked Shiro and Allura together, I don’t know if the rest of the characters will show up so bear with me, Keith is kind of sleeping with everybody, M/M, Mental Fuck, Oblivious Lance (Voltron), Orphan Keith (Voltron), Physical Abuse, actor keith, inspired after reading something, model keith, shiro is a Dad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2019-09-25 05:32:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17115359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itxokayish/pseuds/itxokayish
Summary: Keith’s life seemed to be turning around after the incident that happened two years ago, but wounds start opening up after he gets a new manager and his past starts catching up to him, causing him to go back into the downward spiral he thought he was finally escaping.





	1. Before New

**Author's Note:**

> So I uploaded an anonymous original work of this a few months ago and I actually wanted to return back to this idea, so I am redoing it for this fandom. I unfortunately deleted the original work, but I am hoping that once I redo it, and finish it completely I can return back to the original characters later on (probably not going to happen cause I didn’t even finish the original so don’t hold your breath XD) Anyways, I hope you enjoy this because what I had planned is a major emotionally taxing mess. 
> 
> Be warned that there are various triggers in this story, so read with cautions, there will always be warnings, but just know ahead of time.

Keith’s life wasn’t bad. He was well off into his career, being a model and an upcoming actor in the United States. He had even gotten his first minor role in a small film and a good gig for a new photoshoot in the same week. Everything was going well, but his brother, Shiro worried for his health and had recently told him he was getting a new manager.

He hadn’t had a manager for two weeks now because the last one had been fired, and he wasn’t ready to be babysat by some stranger.  
  
“Your new manager will show up after you have lunch with your costars tomorrow,” Shiro told him as they drove in a car.

“You really don’t need to hire anyone. I am fine taking care of myself,” Keith said.

“Oh, so sleeping with half of the bartenders in the city is sure taking care of yourself,” Shiro scolded as he took a right turn. Keith’s face flushed, half from embarrassment, but mostly from the fact he had drunk that night, despite his very low tolerance for alcohol.

“Way to slut shame me,” Keith said as he rested his head against the cold window glass.

“You can’t keep going like this. You have been this way for two years now. Your life is finally turning around and you have been too long without a proper manager. I can’t keep bailing you out of situations like these. You need to take care of yourself, and not through sex,” Shiro said as they made it to Keith’s apartment.

Keith had moved back to his own apartment a few months ago. If Keith was being honest, it was all in Shiro’s plan to get him out of his new engagement. He had proposed to his long-term girlfriend, Allura, and it kind of broke the mood to have his younger brother coming home with a new guy, or better yet receiving calls every week that he was throwing up in a local bar.

“You just don’t want me around,” Keith said as his brother helped him up the elevator and was now fumbling with the keys to his apartment.

“I just want to not have to worry about you all the time,” Shiro admitted. Coran is saying you are doing well now, and I want to make sure you don’t ruin that.

Coran was the department leader of Keith’s agency, and he had overlooked his career ever since he began. He had even given him a job when he had dropped out of college and gone awol for a whole month. Keith didn’t really think he could have maintained his job if Coran didn’t have a personal connection to him. If he was being honest, he didn’t think he would still be alive and healthy if people didn’t somehow care about him

He found that part rather shocking.

“You just don’t trust me then,” Keith pouted as he was set down on his living room couch.

“Do you need to throw up?” Shiro asked as Keith rambled on. He shook his head.

“How do they look like?” Keith asks, giggling as he looks at the bright lights on the ceiling.

“Well they aren’t too tall, taller than you, but that isn’t much of a feat,” Shiro commented as he went to get his brother a glass of water, handing it to him.

“Hey, that hurts,” Keith pouts as he sloppily drinks the water.

“He seems pretty nice, don’t ruin him,” Shiro continues.

“It’s a guy? You trust me that much?” Keith jokes as he sets the water down and leans against his brother’s shoulder.

“I know, shocker that I have some faith in you still,” Shiro responded. “But seriously, Keith. You have so much potential. Your life is turning around, and you could be so much more if you continue trying.”

“If I wasn’t such a whore, you mean,” Keith sighed.

“Keith, don’t say that-,” Shiro began to say.

“Shut up, you know it’s true,” Keith mumbled, as his eyelids kept trying to close. His words were slurring together at this point. “I know you are disgusted by me, I see it when you pick me up every-time. It’s better to handle it drunk though. I don’t know what I would do if you ever had to pick me up from the doctor’s again,”

“I would rather not go through that again either. Finding out my brother has an STD isn’t the best thing to know,” Shiro agreed, trying to appease to whatever weird topics his brother brought up when he was drunk. “But thing is, I know why you do it. I just wish that wasn’t the way you decided to deal with it.”

Keith chuckled at that as he moaned in pain. It took him a while to formulate an answer. He tried to hide the fact that it hit close to home; that he knew exactly what his brother was talking about. It wasn’t that hard to hide his feelings though, especially when he could mask them in his drunken state.

“Well it’s better than doing drugs,” Keith chuckled.

“You smoke,” Shiro said.

“Shut up,” Keith responded as he lifted his head up from Shiro’s shoulder. “You can leave. You don’t have to stay here and take care of me. Go with your fiancee and do couple things,” Keith said as he tried getting up from the couch, stumbling back from the sudden movement.

“If you let me put you to bed,” Shiro said as he stabilized Keith, who just nodded and gave a slurred and incoherent response.  
  
“You know you are the best brother ever,” Keith giggled again as Shiro put a blanket over him after setting him down in his bed.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You could thank me by not going out to drink when you can’t even take a single beer,” Shiro responded.

“Hmm, maybe not as good of a brother as I thought,” Keith mumbled as he closed his eyes.

“Go to sleep,” Shiro said as he messed Keith’s hair up and rolled his eyes.

“Shiro,” Keith said before Shiro left his room.

“What, Keith?”

“Don’t make any kids tonight,” Keith said.

“I hate you,” Shiro responded as he threw a pillow from one of the chairs by the entrance of Keith’s room at the lump on the bed.

  
“Love you too.”


	2. New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hi, my name is Lance, um-,” the supposed new manager says. The minute Keith sees him he doesn’t know how to react. 
> 
> It’s him. Lance. His college roommate. Someone he hadn’t seen in like five years. Lance was his manager.

**Two years ago**

“You are such a tease,” he said as he ran his fingers through Keith’s hair. Keith didn’t answer but gave a simple pained groan, his whole body ached.

“You still feeling bad?” He said and Keith was slow to register his words, he nodded after a few beats of silence. His head was spinning.

“You want some breakfast? I can cook your favorite, some toast with eggs. I think you deserve the extra carbs. Okay, baby?” He said and Keith sighed, looking up at the sitting figure on his bed. He tried not to focus on the fingers lacing through his hair, fighting the feeling to push them away.

“I love you, I’ll call you when I got it all ready,” he said and he gave Keith a gentle kiss on his cheek, putting the pillow that had gotten on the floor back on the chair by the entrance of the room.

~-~-~-~-

**Now**

“Fucking shit,” Keith cursed as he got out of bed, the headache from last night’s mistake was killing him. It didn’t help that he was already a sensitive as fuck person as well. He walked to the bathroom and looked at himself. His eyes were faintly red, his mouth agape, and his face was plump, plumper than it had been yesterday.

He frowned as he inspected himself more and gave a big sigh, going to take a shower and look like he wasn’t a total disaster case at the moment.

As he got out of the shower he heard his phone go off, giving him the first set of his fifty alarms in the morning. Despite Shiro’s countless bantering about how unorganized he was, he actually did care about his career.

 _First_ _shots_ _at_ _Mulberry_.  
_Lunch_ _with_ _the pervert_.

And a text message.

 **Shiro**  
_Don’t forget to eat, you have a few hours left of freedom before I_ restrict you to a diet.

Keith rolled his eyes as he sent a snarky reply back, and changed into some nice clothes. He had gotten a really a gig for a photoshoot at Mulberry, one of the trendy fashion lines at the moment. He was also excited for his first minor role in a film, even if one of his costars was an actual pervert.

Keith knew he set out vibes, and he was notorious for messing with people’s feeling, but he didn’t like this dude, he really didn’t, especially after the pervert catched feelings after Keith gave into his persistent attempts.

Getting his mind off the topic, he went over to scan his fridge, countless neatly organized, unopened containers with dinners and meals that Allura had cooked him, cause Shiro can’t cook for shit. They were care packages, meant to make sure Keith ate.

He frowned as he took out a cup of orange juice just to swallow down some Advil pills. He also took a bite of an apple for good measure.

He then checked the time and gathered his stuff.

Today was going to be a long day.

~-~-~-~

  
“Looking good, Kogane,” his costar said as they sat at lunch together, reading over lines and chatting with one another.

Keith didn’t respond and instead continued reading his lines. Everyone else giggled or either rolled their eyes at Keith’s reaction or lack of. They all knew that Sebastian’s attempts at being flirty were continuous, and at this point, everyone was used to it.

They didn’t know what an actual clingy person he was. It was annoying.

“Aren’t you getting a new manager?” Sebastian asked, but he still ignored him.

“A new manager?” Another person in the group asked. Keith looked up, stopping his continuous poking at food to answer.

“Yeah, he is supposed to come after this,” Keith responded.

“How much do you think he will last?” Sebastian asked and Keith’s eyes were already picking up at what Sebastian was implying. He excused himself to the bathroom and took the time to whisper his answer to Sebastian.

“As much as you last in bed.” Sebastian started choking on his water. The rest of the people didn’t hear, but they all got a laugh out of it, so did Keith.

By the time Keith came back, they were done running through the rest of the scenes they has worked on that day and he was getting his stuff. His phone chimed and he got another text.

_**Shiro** _  
_Your new victim as here at the agency, get here before Coran cuts my head off._

Keith rolled his eyes. Coran was really being serious about Keith getting his life on track, and Shiro wasn’t kidding either. He was about to respond until he felt a hand on him. He flinched and turned around.

“Do you need a ride?” Sebastian asked behind him, everyone had filtered out. Keith looked at the time and frowned yet again that day.

He forgot to order a ride to the agency, one of the photoshoot people offered to take him to lunch, and a driver would take too long to get here.

But he really hated Sebastian.

“I have to go talk to Coran anyways, so I am heading over there. Plus, would love to see the new poor soul that has to take care of you,” Sebastian said as he gently and lovingly patted Keith’s head, making Keith freeze up. “I love how the gentlest touches make you freak out so much, but when you are being rammed you are barely phased.”

“Stop touching me,” Keith protests, slapping away his hand. “If you are taking me, we need to leave now. Shiro and Coran both want to kill me at the moment.”

“Aren’t you great at ruining the mood?” Sebastian asks as he follows Keith out of the building.

It takes them a while to get there because city traffic is absolutely horrendous. By the time they get there, Keith is not only ten minutes late, but receiving death glares from both his brother and his boss.

Nevertheless, Shiro takes no time in introducing them.

“Hi, my name is Lance, um-,” the supposed new manager says. The minute Keith sees him he doesn’t know how to react.

It’s him. _Lance_. His college roommate. Someone he hadn’t seen in five years. Lance was his manager. If Keith was being honest, he was one of the few people that actually impacted his life.

He had opened up to him after a week or so of living together, but then he had just disappeared, dropped out due to how much he sucked at living. He knows Lance recognizes him, he sees the way his eyes sparkle.

Lance had confessed to liking him. Keith remembered how they non-officially dated, how he had run away and ignored his texts.

_Why the hell did he apply to be my manager?_

Keith just introduced himself as if nothing happened between them. He didn’t want to explain everything to everyone in the room.

He could feel the tension in the room and was just grateful that the two years he spent in college were unknown to the rest of the world. It was almost becoming unknown to Keith as well, but seeing Lance was reopening things that Keith did not want open.

“He has a shoot tomorrow afternoon and then he needs new headshots,” Coran said as he started listing off different things throughout the week that had to be done.

Keith hated this. He hated managers, being taken care of, someone constantly there to remind him that he had no sense of privacy. He hated this more, though. Maybe if he pretended he didn’t know Lance thought he could just ignore this being awkward.

He had gotten really good at not giving two shits about anything, so what feat could this possibly bring to the table. To be honest, what was he really afraid of?

  
Sure, Lance would see that college Keith and Keith now were different, but what did it matter. It’s not like Keith cared about what he thought. It was just being scared of what Lance would have to compare, right? But, Lance signed up for this, he had to know what Keith was now, the rumors were something everyone knew about, more so how it wasn’t really a rumor.

“Keith?” Shiro suddenly said as he ended his own tangent on how Keith needed serious care.

Keith just hummed in question, and Shiro responded, “You zoned out for a bit.”

“Sorry, um, it’s great to meet you. I hope I am not too much of a nuisance. I will see you tomorrow,” Keith said suddenly, obviously this was not where they were in the conversation, and everyone looked at him strangely.

“Don’t you want to get dinner later?” Shiro asked the whole group inside of Coran’s offices and Keith’s alarms were going off.

“Well, I just had lunch, and I am a bit tired, so,” Keith said, and Shiro noticed the anxiety coming off of his brother. Coran did too. It wasn’t that hard when Keith was acting like someone completely different.

 _Anxious_. _Antsy_. _Fumbling_ his words. Escaping a conversation very _poorly_.

He hadn’t acted like this since he was in high school, since before the incident. Shiro eyes him weirdly and tried not to draw much attention to it.

“Well, how about Lance takes you home? Give him a scope of your place, so he knows where to go in case of any emergency,” Coran suggests.

Keith just nods and notices the weird looks.

 _You’re_ _acting_ _weird_. _Stop_ _it_.

So he does, and tries to regain at least some of his _I_ _don’t_ _give_ _a_ _shit_ aura.

~-~-~-~-~  
The car ride is so uncomfortable, even worse than riding with Sebastian who literally gropes him every five seconds.

“So this your place?” Lance asks and Keith shrugs and hums as he opens his door up, revealing the small space. It wasn’t really much of anything. He lived on the second to top floor of the whole building so the elevator ride was quite a long wait. But his loft wasn’t anything impressive, just decorated nice.

It had one bedroom, a bathroom, and an open kitchen and living room area. There was also a nice balcony, but Keith never took the time to go out on it.

“So,” Lance said as he set his keys down on Keith’s dining room table while Keith hung up his coat. He was wearing a slim black turtleneck and some skinny jeans, and having a jacket on was too hot for indoors, despite the cool weather outside.  
“Don’t make the mood weird,” Keith said as he made his way to where Lance was, sitting down on the small circular table where Lance had put his keys down. “Do you want a drink or something.”

“Shiro said not to let you drink, apparently, you don’t have any type of tolerance,” Lance teased, and Keith felt something, he didn’t know what, but it was sure something.

“Shiro just worries a lot,” Keith said, it was much flirty now.

 _What_ _am_ _I_ _trying_ _to_ _do_?

Lance seemed to notice his tone and he smirked, even though the obvious flush of his cheeks.

“So you’re saying you can take it?” Lance asks, returning the tone of voice and Keith nods, as Lance places one of his hands against the table, leaning over Keith’s sitting form.

“I’m a responsible adult,” Keith whispers and he finds himself connecting their lips before Lance or he has a chance to continue talking. He didn’t know why he continued, why he started doing the thing he did with everyone.

He was leading him on, he was messing with his feelings.

 _He_ _came_ _here_ _for_ _a_ _reason_. _He_ _either_ _came_ _here_ _for_ _me_ , _or_ _it’s_ _just_ _a_ _coincidence_.

“Keith,” Lance breathed as he disconnected their lips and rested his hands on Keith’s shoulders.

“Afraid of what you’ve heard?” Keith teases as he starts to unbutton Lance’s jeans. He internally grins at how flustered Lance gets.

“Keith, we shouldn’t do this,” Lance says, but makes no effort to stop him. At that point, any suspicions Keith had had been confirmed. Lance wanted him. The tone of his voice was cautious, but it wasn’t unfamiliar, it was gentle, loving.

 _He recognizes me too_.

Another sloppy kiss, and Lance running his hand through his hair. 

He remembered him, he was definitely going with Keith’s lie. 

_God, I’m an awful person._

Keith thought as he Let himself be picked up and seated down on the small table. They took a few beats to breathe, and Lance spoke, “Keith,” before Keith reached over to the counter behind him where a bottle of some type of liquor stood. 

Lance’s eyes widened and had to take in what Keith had just done. 

“Just pour me a drink,” Keith said.

”I shouldn't be letting you do this,” Lance said as he grabbed the bottle anyways, leaving Keith disheveled on the table. 

“But, you want to,” Keith replied. “Lance,” Keith added in a tone that he knew worked on almost all of his partners. 

Lance poured him a drink without question. 

_I hate how much I enjoy doing this._


	3. Different

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You are so sentimental,” Keith responded, as he sat down at the chair by the entrance of his room.
> 
> “What-,” Lance said as he looked at Keith.
> 
> “If you came here because you missed me, then we should be fine then?” Keith said.

**Seven Years Ago**

Keith was a year older than him, but they were in the same major. When he first met Keith, they were in the same club volunteering for a local marathon. They were simply handing out shirts to get some volunteer hours. They got assigned to the same post, and Lance wanted to break the tension.

“Hey,” he had said and Keith had looked at him with his grey-violet eyes. Lance could feel his heartbeat speed up as he made eye contact.  Keith looked perfectly still as he responded with a faint smile, but then a frown.

“What was that?” Lance had said as he processed the face of utter disgust that Keith had put on.

“We should focus on handing out shirts,” Keith responded as he passed a bright neon yellow shirt to a little child participating in the run.

Lance rolled his eyes.

He never talked to Keith after that until the second semester of his freshman year where his dorm roommate had dropped out. After that, some changes to dorms as people had requested new dorms for the second semester. His new roommate had been Keith.

~-~-~-~-~

**Now**

“Keith,” Lance breathed as he planted his palms on either side of Keith’s head. Keith looked up at him, face flushed and mouth agape.

“Don’t-hic-look at me like that,” Keith whimpered as he broke eye contact and brought his hands to lay on Lance’s clothed chest. His face was so fucking hot. “Just get it over with.”

Lance looked at Keith, the man below him looked so different from their times in college. His hair was shorter, his emotions were a lot more vivid, and he so easily let himself be touched and manhandled. 

Somewhere in Lance, he felt some unease, but he couldn’t resist the way Keith just melted in his arms, giving him permission to touch him after not seeing him for so long. He knew there was some reason to why Keith had pretended not to remember him, but now, he couldn’t care less as to why.

“Just do it,” Keith gasped as his bare body arched off the bed as Lance prepped him.

“You must have done this a lot,” Lance said as he flipped Keith over onto his side, making the man whimper. Keith’s body felt so hot underneath him, and it looked so different as well. 

Where there had been slim muscle, there was nothing. He had grown much thinner, but it definitely didn’t make him less attractive, just  _different_.

“It’s big,” Keith mumbled as he responded so easily to Lance’s touches. His body was always so sensitive.

Lance had known that from college, but he had never gotten this far. They only dated for the last two months they had known each other, the rest they were just friends. Plus, it wasn’t like Keith let anyone touch him like that. Well, like this. 

“When did you become like this?” Lance teased as he went faster.

“Hm, go-go slow,” Keith whimpered as Lance continued.

“I heard the things people have said, do you really just let anyone have their way with you, now?” Lance asked as he continued. Keith moaned as he kept avoiding eye contact.

“Look at me,” Lance said as he grabbed Keith’s jaw.

Keith suddenly started giggling as he sat up, grabbing where Lance was and making purposeful eye contact.

“You talk too much,” Keith slurred as he moved his hands to wrap around Lance’s neck. “Just do what you came here to do, no more.”

~-~-~-~-~

“I’m so sorry. Keith. This won’t happen again, it was so unprofessional of me. I-I shouldn’t have done that,” Lance had said as he stood beside Keith’s bed.

After he had awoken in Keith’s bed, seen the mess they had made, he had rushed to the bathroom, shocked at how lost he had gotten in the situation. As soon as he heard Keith’s rustling, he had rushed out to apologize.

“You know, I thought I would never see you again,” Keith said as he wrapped his bare body in the covers, the sheets slipping off his shoulder as he sat up. He rubbed his head as he felt pulses of the alcohol from the last night.

Lance looked up to him in confusion. Was he admitting to pretending he didn’t know him?

“I am a lot different than you remember, right?” Keith asked, giving a sweet smile as he let his head rest on his hand, which rested upon his crossed legs.

“Keith, we just-,” Lance began to say. “We just had-for the first time-we-.”

“Yeah, we did,” Keith smiled again. “Is that what you came for? Google searched me and realized you can finally get what you couldn’t get in college?” Lance tried reading between the lines, but Keith’s tone of voice and body language didn’t seem to mean those words in the harsh way they sounded.

“No, Keith, I-,” Lance stuttered again. “I just-Well I wanted to see you. I graduated and my cousin, she’s Coran’s family friend.”

“I just heard there was a spot open, and I-just wanted to see you,” Lance admitted as he looked down. He expected a response but instead was met with a whiff of smoke as Keith lit a cigarette. When he looked up Keith had put on a long t-shirt, going to open a window to let fresh air in.

“You really liked me that much?” Keith mumbled, hoping it wouldn’t be completely audible.

“Yes,” Lance answered instinctively, blushing at how sudden and natural the response came to him. “Yes, I missed you a lot. Keith, I know-what we just did,” Lance began to say, “I know that I might not mean much to you- if you want me to quit, I will.”

“You are so sentimental,” Keith responded, as he sat down at the chair by the entrance of his room.

“What-,” Lance said as he looked at Keith.

“If you came here because you missed me, then we should be fine then?” Keith said as he tapped his cigarette on an ashtray on a small table beside the chair he sat at.

“What are you saying?” Lance asked.

“That you came here to see me, you saw me. If that's all, do you really want to keep seeing me? Are you sure you will be fine with this type of relationship?” Keith asked, taking another smoke. The suggestive language made Lance blush, but it didn’t make his answer any less hesitant than before.

“I do. I am,” Lance said, making Keith flinch, he was good at hiding it though. Keith seemed to be waiting for another response, but when he didn’t get any he put the cigarette down on the ashtray.

“I have to go see the doctor before I go get pictures taken. Call me a driver,” Keith said, walking into the bathroom.


	4. Constant

**Then**

“Keith you need to eat,” Pidge had said. She might as well of been talking to a corpse. Those eyes, literally seeping of color and life just stared at her, barely even blinking.

“Everyone is worried.”

“I,” Keith spoke, the first word since he stepped into her office. “I know,” he finished, his lips chapped, the cut still prominent on his busted lip. “Don’t worry it’s something that will pass. You guys can chill.” He hated how small his voice sounded. He even whimpered out the last words, wincing at himself.

_Fucking, pathetic._

“We just want to help,” Pidge continues as she sets her tablet down with all his info. “Hunk is going to come and get you hooked up to an IV. You are dehydrated,” she added as she walked out she sounded disappointed, it hurt Keith.

After that, it was a few minutes of silence. It almost scared Keith. The cold hospital air just consuming his weak frame as he picked at his hands. The bruises were almost all gone. They weren’t as bad as the ones he had gotten before though.

Keith chuckled to himself as he thought about it. Some sick joke that no one would understand. Some sick joke that he let happen.

“Hey,” Hunk had said as he opened the door. “This way,” Hunk added, not even letting the door close or stepping into the room, just waited for Keith to come to him.

“It’s nice to see you,” Hunk said.

“Yes, a true honor I bet,” Keith responded. It didn’t come out right though. He meant to make Hunk smile, make light of the situation, but nothing he did made anyone look at him differently.

If anything, they knew him too well to let him do what he did best.

Hide it. Hide everything. Smile, joke.

They knew it wasn’t a joke. It wasn’t something Keith could “handle on his own”, not something that they could all be “chill about”. It was worrisome, it was terrifying. It hurt them.

Sometimes he wishes that his secret had stayed a secret for longer then he wouldn’t have to be in this situation, the recovery process.

Then he curses himself for ever thinking that because he’s an idiot to want to go back to that hell.

* * *

  **Now**

"She’s young,” Lance heard a voice say behind him, it was one of the nurses. He had been looking into Keith’s doctor’s office, suspicious of how such a young woman could be taking care of Keith.

“Huh?” Lance asked as he turned around to face the person. He was plump, his skin tan, and the brightest smile on his face. Lance liked his aura the minute he saw him.

“Dr. Holt,” the nurse said as he directed his eyes past the glass separating the hallway from Dr. Holt’s office. Keith and her were seen talking inside, she was sitting on her desk as Keith sat on one of the couches. They looked to be gossiping more than they looked to be talking about Keith’s health.

“Oh, yeah. She does look very young. How experienced is she?” Lance asked, almost sounding defensive. How was someone so young entrusted with someone’s care?

“Well, trust me. She is more than capable of taking care of any patient that comes her way. She is the best Keith can get. You must be the new manager. Pidge-I mean Dr. Holt told me about you.”

“Lance,” he introduced himself. “Yeah, I’m the new manager. What about you? What do they call you?” Lance asked, making the conversation awkward. The nurse laughed though and set the clipboard he has in his hands on a nearby counter.

“Hunk,” the man said. “I’m a nurse here, mostly work with Dr. Holt and her patients. It’s good to see someone looking out for Keith.” The nurse sighed. “He’s been through a lot, it’s a good thing he has someone now. He can be quite a handful though.”

“What do you mean?” Lance asked.

“Oh,” Hunk said, realizing he let too much information slip. “It’s not my place to say. Just that, it’s been difficult for quite some time now, and it’s good to know that someone is looking after him. He deserves that.”

Lance just hummed his response, sensing that pressing further wouldn’t do much but stop the conversation entirely. Hunk looked like he was about to say something else, but a beep was heard from his pager.

“Oh, sorry I have to go. But it was nice meeting you, Lance,” Hunk said as he went down the hallway after getting his clipboard and checking some things on it.

_What does he mean? It’s been hard? After what…_

His thoughts got interrupted by a loud laugh from inside the office. His brow furrowed as he watched the pair joke around inside. What could they possibly be talking about?

 

* * *

 

“So now you have a new watchdog?” Pidge said as she got off the desk and pulled up Keith’s actual information on her computer.

“Shiro keeps his word,” Keith sighed as he leaned back on the couch in front of Pidge’s desk. “Are you going to lecture me too, now?” Keith chuckled as Pidge rolled her eyes and turned her monitor so Keith could see.

“We got all your information from your check-up today, and this is what came up,” Pidge said as she pointed to the screen and moved her mouse over his weight and iron levels.

“I feel like that’s a bad thing,” Keith chuckled again.

“Well, it was a lot worse, so I guess it’s an improvement. But it’s still not good. You need to eat, and you can’t be pushing yourself again. You won’t be able to take it again if you don’t.”

“Yeah, that sounds like Shiro,” Keith said as he tapped his fingers on the armrest of the couch.

“Keith, you know how serious this is,” Pidge sighed as he continued reading him his stats. “Plus, I hear you are still going out and losing your shit. I know you hate when I tell you this, but you have to stop. Things are not shitty anymore, you can look past this.”

Keith nodded, knowing fully what she wanted out of him. He was too tired to try to even argue. He knew he didn’t have good points for fucking up his life, at least most of them were invalid to almost everyone around him.

Pidge and he caught up on a few more things before it was time for her to leave. Lance was still outside, standing in the same position he was when he entered the office after getting his checkup. He didn’t know if he found it cute or just creepy.

He settled for cute. It was more fun that way.

* * *

 The rest of the day was fine, there wasn’t anything remotely worth committing to memory. It was average. Running lines, photoshoot. Shiro patronizing him. Lance did turn red every time Keith managed to look in his direction though, that was amusing.

Nothing really happened until he went into the parking lot and he felt someone yank him. Keith’s heart sped up as he turned around almost instantly, adrenaline suddenly coursing through him.

“Whoa, you act as if I’m about to stab you to death,” Sebastian’s annoying voice echoes around him. Keith breathes in deeply and glares at Sebastian.

“Don’t fucking do that, you bastard,” Keith hisses as he readjusts the cardigan he was wearing.

“Where’s your little minion? Did he already realize you’re a bit much?” Sebastian teased and Keith only continued glaring.

“He’s talking to Coran,” Keith responds.

“Do you think he would let me take you out to dinner?” Sebastian asked and Keith frowned.

“Not if he believes if human dignity,” Keith teased as he tried walking away.

“Keith,” Sebastian said as he grabbed him again. Gentler.

“Sebastian, what do you want from me?” Keith asked the question he already knew the answer to for the hundredth time.

“You already know what I want,” Sebastian responded and Keith frowned again.

“You already know the answer,” Keith replied as he yanked his arm away and headed towards his car.

“Hey, I thought your manager was taking you home,” Sebastian managed to say after a couple of beats of silence and a loud beep, unlocking of Keith’s car ringed.

“Well, he’s taking too long, and I need a drink to forget about your headassery,” Keith said as he lifted both of his hands above his head as he walked away, back towards Sebastian, both middle fingers up.

“You idiot, you aren’t drinking right?” Sebastian asked and the response he got was a car door slamming shut.

“Keith!” Sebastian yelled as he started pulling out of the parking lot.

Keith just honked and drove away.

He knew where he was going though.

Everyone did.

And everyone knew what would happen after a few hours. 

What was different this time though was that the hands that pried him off the car counter were tanner, gentler, and the face that looked down at him was filled with so much more pity and disappointment. 

 


	5. Hidden in Plain Sight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Now that you mention it,” Keith gave in, “I feel a bit nauseous. I’ll just work on an article.”
> 
> There was no verbal response to that. Just a satisfied hum and a peck on his cheek.
> 
> Keith’s stomach churned at that. He didn’t know if it was because he was starving, or because he was disgusted at how happy his approval and happiness made him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: mental manipulation, emotional abuse, abusive relationships, eating disorder

**Two Years Ago**

“You’re gaining a bit of weight,” he said, and Keith’s smile was quick to fall.

“I went to the gym yesterday,” Keith responded as he continued to make dinner. He was behind him, his breath on his neck as he chopped the vegetables.

He was making vegetable soup because Keith knew that’s what he liked. It’s what would make him happy, maybe even make the night bearable.

“Huh,” he said. “Maybe you’re just bloated then. Did you already eat?” He pulled away from Keith’s frame, and grabbed a slice of toast, taking a big bite out of it. Maybe just to spite Keith.

Keith wanted to sigh, wanted to act annoyed. He wanted to let him know that he knew what he was trying to do. Trying to shame him into not eating, convince him he was gaining weight.

But of course, he didn’t.

He just stayed quiet and shrugged.

Keith didn’t know if that was the better option because he went behind him, slow enough to strike anxiety. He felt his hands on his shoulders, stroking all the way to his hips.

He hated when he did this to him.

This one action, striking all the nerves, hitting all the right triggers to make him get what his point was.

“Now that you mention it,” Keith gave in, “I feel a bit nauseous. I’ll just work on an article.”

There was no verbal response to that. Just a satisfied hum and a peck on his cheek.

Keith’s stomach churned at that. He didn’t know if it was because he was starving, or because he was disgusted at how happy his approval and happiness made him.

* * *

 

**Now**

“Your job is to make sure this doesn’t happen,” Shiro continued lecturing. All Lance could do was listen. It’s what he had been doing for the past ten minutes.

“Understood?” Shiro asked and Lance nodded, apologized for the tenth time, and left the room.

He sighed as he went to Keith’s dressing room. He walked in, and Keith was still passed out on the couch, curled up and drooling a little out of his mouth.

To be honest, it was pretty disgusting, but to Lance, well it was pretty cute.

“Hey,” he said, slightly moving Keith’s sleeping body to wake him.

Keith just groaned in response, but eventually woke after a couple of attempts.

“What the fuck do you want?” Keith asked, seemingly confused as to where he was or who he was speaking to.

“Oh, it’s you,” Keith said in a tone that was neither offended or happy.

Lance just nodded as he gave him a water bottle and helped situate him.

“Hm,” Keith said as he chugged down half the bottle. “So you like drunk Keith? You gotta kink or something? Am I going to see your face every morning after I drink myself to sleep?”

Lance’s face flushed red and he stuttered out his words, “No-um, Of-of course not. It’s just you-were, and well it’s my job to-.”

“Whoa, calm down I’m just throwing out bullshit,” Keith said as he threw the water bottle at Lance to catch. He stood up and went to pick some clothes to get changed.  Lance turned around, out of courtesy looking at one of the opposite corners.

Even though there wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen before.

“You have a shoot in thirty minutes,” Lance finally said after a couple of beats of silence.

“Yeah, I know,” Keith responds, in that same tone that Lance can’t identify or categorize. It’s indifferent in a way. Like most of Keith now.

“Also your apartment called and said you had gotten a visitor last night,” Lance reported. “He says he’s a close friend that you haven’t seen in a while. He left his number in case you want me to schedule something later.”

There was silence for a while. Lance expected a response, but instead, he heard a door opening and water start to run.

_Well, okay._

Lance thought as he turned around. At least the part of Keith that was rude as hell hadn’t changed. The thing that Lance liked about him had been that. Because even though it was considered him being rude, it wasn’t actually. It was the Keith way to deal with something he didn’t want to.

He didn’t.

He just ignored it and literally _ran away_. It was one of the reasons that their relationship, although short, just didn’t work out. One thing wouldn’t work out and Keith would take it as a sign that their relationship fell apart. Ironically, him _leaving_ is what ruined it in the end.

Keith, then, was simple to understand. He was blunt when he was angry, would blush when he was happy and would be distant when he wanted space.

Keith, now, was confusing. He spoke in riddles, always smiled, and had random burst of emotion. His external aura made you think he wanted you to be his friend, but once you started talking you question if he even liked you at all.

It was frustrating.

“Okay, so you taking me or what?” Lance heard Keith’s voice yell as he came out of the bathroom door, towel in his hands as he dried his hair. It was a lot easier to dry now that it wasn’t as long.

For as much shit as he would give Keith for his hair length, he actually missed it a lot now.

“I know I’m gorgeous, but you can stop looking now,” Keith laughed. “We got things to do and places to be,” he clapped to annunciate each word. Lance let out another awkward chuckle as he grabbed his phone from his pocket and pulled up the address.

He got the keys from his pockets as Keith put his shoes on and combed his fingers through his hair.

 

* * *

 

“When did you decide to cut your mullet?” Lance finally got the confidence to ask as they were in the parking lot, getting into the car.

“It was just a lot to maintain,” Keith responded. “Plus, most shoots prefer it short.” Lance hummed in response, catching a glimpse of Keith as he started up the car.

He had situated himself on his side. His head supported by one of his hands that was propped on the car window.

After a couple of minutes of driving, Keith pulled out his phone. The quick clicking of his keyboard was the only noise that filled the car until he silenced his phone and put it away. He let out a sigh. It sounded frustrated, but as Lance looked over discreetly during a stop light, Keith was nervously working his bottom lip with his teeth.

Lance would have told him to stop; that he would make his lips raw and make makeup angry, but he didn’t.

When they got to the shoot, Keith’s body looked tense. When he was told to loosen up, he chuckled and cracked a joke making the photographer and the crew laugh and ignore the obvious anxiety emitting from him.

They were able to get some successful shots towards the end when Keith seemed to forget about what had him so on the edge.

They were about to leave, but Keith insisted that he needed to go do something real quick with all of the other models. Lance gave in, but he had been waiting for ten minutes, and he was worried he had lost track of him again.

_Shiro’s going to kill me._

Lance cursed mentally as he started to go look for him. He went in various rooms, got some yelling, some screams from people changing until he finally found Keith.

He was in one of the dressing rooms on someone’s lap. The guy who was on the receiving end of the make-out session looked up at Lance with absolute horror. Keith just rolled his eyes and got up.

“I’m coming,” Keith simply said as he adjusted his clothes, placed a peck at the stranger and walked out before Lance.

The guy looked like he was going to stutter out an excuse, but Lance just glared at him before slamming the door shut.

“Keith-,” he started to say before Keith cut him off.

“Yes, yes, don’t make out with strangers,” Keith said. “Don’t get too jealous.”

“That’s not what I was-no. Keith, it’s not that. You just should be careful what you do. Not only because of-you know, but if word gets out-,” Lance tried responding.

“Ha, don’t worry, everyone already knows,” Keith chuckled dryly as they made their way outside. Something about how he delivered that made Lance’s heart ached.

“I wish you wouldn’t,” Lance said before he even processed what he was saying. Keith turned around and started laughing.

“What? You want me all to yourself? Don’t like seeing your college boyfriend suck face with anyone?”

Lance didn’t respond, and instead just unlocked the car.

“What? Did I make you angry now?” Keith asked as he buckled up and Lance started the car.

He really didn’t want to fight with him.

“I'm dropping you off at your apartment,” Lance responded as he turned on some music, letting the tension die itself out.

Soon enough, they got to Keith’s apartment. Lance walked him in.

Not a word was spoken until Keith opened the door to his apartment.

“You don’t have to do that,” Keith had said.

“What?” Lance asked.

“If you’re angry just yell at me. If I’m being an asshole, you don’t have to try to be a peacemaker. Just tell me I’m being a horrible person,” Keith replied, the words coming out almost robotically with a hurt underlying tone.

Lance looked at him shocked.

“I’m not going to start yelling at you for whatever reason,” Lance said. “You might frustrate me sometimes, but there’s no reason to start fighting over something so small.”

Keith bit at his lip and nodded.

“Well, sorry for being an asshole,” he said as he held the door in between his right hand. “Thank you for taking me home.” His face grew another smile and Lance did the same.

“See you tomorrow,” Lance said goodbye, and he got a smile and a wave from Keith as he walked down the hall. He turned to go back to the car, but he didn’t see where he was going and ended up bumping into a man.

He looked mature, older. His skin was tan, and his hair was platinum, almost white color.

“Ah, sorry,” Lance apologized.

“No, my mistake. I didn’t look where I was going,” the man responded as he smiled and continued walking. Lance did the same until he reached the car.

When he finally started it up, he thought about Keith. The way he got angry, the way he started arguments, but also the way he almost drowned in guilt when he told Lance to not be nice to him.

Something about it made Lance’s heart ache more. But he quickly pushed the thought away.

He wasn’t here to grow close to Keith. He had already crossed that line on his first day of the job. He was here to make sure Keith didn’t mess up his career, he had no business meddling in his personal life.


End file.
